THE BLONDE YEAR IN REVIEW
January: Took her new scarf back to the store because it was too tight.
February: Couldn't work in a pharmacy because the bottles wouldn't fit into the typewriter.
March: Got excited when she finished a jigsaw puzzle in 6 months because the box said "2-4 years."
April: Was trapped on an escalator for hours when the power went out.
May: Couldn't make Kool-Aid because 8 cups of water won't fit into those little packets.
June: Couldn't learn to water ski because she couldn't find a lake with a slope.
July: After losing in a breast stroke swimming competition, complained to the judges that the other swimmers were using their arms.
August: Told her blonde friend to hurry when trying to get into their locked car using a coat hanger because it was starting to rain and the top was down.
September: When asked what the capital of California was: answered "C."
October: Hates M & M's because they are so hard to peel.
November: Baked a turkey for 4 days because the instructions said 1 hour per pound and she weighed 120.
December: Couldn't call 911 because there was no "11" on any phone button.
